3 tips for moving on from a setback

Change what you see, hear and feel

Imagine you are sat in a cinema watching a film, staring you, in which you go through the event that caused you a setback. Watch it all the way through until you are safely the other side. Now rewind it fast and watch it all in reverse in a matter of seconds.

Now watch it again, except this time it’s a cartoon. Notice the vivid cartoon colours and the cartoon characters wearing cartoon drawn clothing and shoes with cartoon hair. If there are animals or creatures in the film, they will also be cartoons as will any vehicles or boats. Even the sun or moon in the sky or indoor lighting is a cartoon. Watch it all the way through until you are safely through to the other side. Now do another fast rewind and watch it all in reverse in a matter of seconds ago.

We’re going to watch the film again, this time with a sound track. The sound track can be your favourite song, a film track, from your TV programme or comedy. Watch all the cartoon characters as before but this time with music playing. Watch the film all the way through until you’re safely to the other side.

Have you noticed how changing key things about the movie also changes how you feel about the event?

So what is a feeling? It is neither good or bad for you until you associate memory and experience with it. Therefore if you disrupt the memory by changing how it looks, sounds and feels, then the emotions attached to the memory also change.

Act as if

OK, so something didn’t go the way you planned. You can choose how you move forwards and you can choose how to approach it next time.

Perhaps you’ve had the experience of how you would have preferred to act before. If not, can you think of someone who has that you could copy?

Think about how that version of you or that other person would stand? How would they breathe? How would they move or walk? What words would they use? What would their attitude be like? See the things they would see, hear the things they would hear, feel the things they would feel.

Notice how your own ‘state’ changes as you do this.

Ultimately there is no difference between acting and being. If you act for long enough you can take on that persona and eventually you can’t tell the difference between acting and being.

Learn and move on

So not everything goes to plan. It happens. Learn what you need to learn from the experience and store the learnings away. Now choose to let go of any negative thoughts and limiting beliefs, they are not helpful. You have all the resources you need. You can choose to simply change your mind.

Do these tips sound simple? Well, there’s a reason for that, they are!

If you would rather have some help to deal with phobias, fears or negative emotions, get in touch: www.emma2france.com ~ emma@emma2france.com ~ 07702 814690